As a teenager, confrontations with your parents are almost unavoidable. Â They almost serve as a stepping stone into adulthood, helping learn when it is appropriate to stand up to authority and when it isn’t. Â At the same time, excessive confrontation with one’s parents is definitely a behavioral issue. Â Thus, it becomes a key point in a teenager’s life to determine when confrontation is appropriate and when it is not.
As a general rule, I try to avoid confrontation when I can. Â While it is necessary sometimes, making an attempt to avoid it will help keep you from getting into situations that you don’t want to be in. Â While you will get into some confrontations, this is always a good start. Â Once you have attempted to avoid the confrontation altogether, it is time to decide if it is something that you should get involved in.
- Do you feel strongly about what you are arguing about? Â If you don’t feel particularly strongly about the subject,then just avoid it. Â It seems like common sense, but it still should be pointed out. Â Arguing about something you lack a strong opinion on is basically a waste of your time.
- Can you win this argument? Â There are some arguments that you cannot ever win, even if you are right. Â This is not necessarily a deal-breaker, because sometimes you need to voice your opinion no matter what, but you still should take this into consideration.
- What are the risks of getting into this confrontation? Â In better words, is it worth it? Â Sometimes, the repercussions are far worse than any perceived benefit. Â If that is true, you need to seriously reconsider if is worth it. Â Not matter what happens, you are taking losses.
- Can you keep your cool?  While this seems like an odd question to ask oneself before an argument, it actually has an important role.  If you are too emotionally involved, you might become excessively argumentative, which is always bad.  You never want to become hurtful or violent with your family.
Learning when to argue with your parents and when not to is an important part of growing up. Â When you are unclear if this is the right time to confront or not, just ask yourself this simple series of questions.
Photo courtesy of Mattox.