OK, so here it is, I volunteered at my son’s school to chaperone a dance, and all I can say is wow. There are few words to describe what I witnessed, and heard at this event, and did I mention that this was my son’s first dance?
First I will say that initially I was excited because I happen to have very fond memories of middle and high school dances. (And no, it wasn’t 100 years ago, well almost not; does that make sense?) Sorry, I will also have to tell you that I have two boys, a husband, one male dog and one male cat. So if you are really observant, you will notice that I am the only female in my family and spending time with prepubescent girls is not really in my realm, suffice it to say, it was a real shock to my system!
Now the dance started out normal enough although it had a striking resemblance to the movie “Sixteen Candles†and my husband urged me not to give my underwear to anyone! The kids were definitely reluctant to be the first one to dance, and when someone did dance, everyone just stood around staring in some weird voyeuristic grouping that was a little unsettling. Too much? And then there were, of course, the kids that decided to start grinding each other in a very uncomfortable and awkward way (I really don’t know how else to describe that)! Did I mention these are sixth, seventh and eighth graders? Am I just old?
And the music, well, don’t even get me started! OK, I know, I sound really old now, but not too old right? I made a point of talking with the DJ, which of course thrilled my thirteen year old son, and suggested some music that might get things moving, and lo and behold, they started to dance, at the dance! Now I know that music has changed and a significant part of that change is rap music. With that being said, take a group of awkward, gangly, insecure kids and tell them to dance to it, not so easy for them, looked more like they had ants in their pants! Too judgey? Some of the music, let’s face it, just not up my alley, but hey, who am I to tell other people what to listen to? Although once Michael Jackson’s “Thriller†came on (yes ,I suggested it) the kids went crazy and everybody danced. I was just happy they knew who Michael Jackson was!
Of course at every dance, there is always someone who will feel the need to have a PDA on the dance floor and I thought, “This kid is going to swallow this poor girl due to his tongue being so far down her little throat!” This, my friends, was the cherry on the sundae of my evening, prying apart two children, making out. All in a night’s work at the middle school dance, and yes, I will most likely volunteer again. After all, someone has to show these kids how to dance, and yes, I still have the moves!